oh my. it’s been a whirlwind these last several days, trying hard to keep my head above water with little sleep. i’ve been trying to come up with a phrase other than “i’m busy” to say when things are like this. i dread saying those words. they’re oversaid, and often empty attempts at trying to get some sort of weird validation or some strange societal thing that we must always be producing, working, doing. those words make me feel closed, a bit frantic, and uninspired. we’re all busy. life is a twirling heap of things to do, things not to do, relax, read, don’t relax, running errands, dayjobs, connections with friends and family, alone time. it’s all always there but isn’t there a better, softer way to say “i’m busy”?
gina and i have been jokingly saying “we’re wide open” instead, both chuckling because we both know its deeper meaning (“i’m busy”). the whole thing is cracking me up as i sit and write this, but seriously i don’t ever want to be too busy for the good stuff of life. i don’t want to drown in the meaningless, seemingly never ending details of life. i want to be wide open.