(it reads “creative soul” on her hat – original sold, but matted/signed prints available
here)
earlier this week, a dear sweet soul name Mariette sent me an email explaining why
this post i wrote nearly 4 years ago was her favorite of my entire blog:
I can’t say specifically what it is that I love about this post, but that it’s right at the beginning if your art journey. It seems like there is a lot of anticipation and excitement in this post. It’s almost like the beginning of a Christmas movie, where the entire city shuts down because of snow and you go in your car with Bella to pick up your husband…..There is also something about the photo at the end. It’s so simple and everyday, yet it’s magical. Looking outside from within. It inspires me!
Receiving this sweet email prompted me to head over to that old post and consider where I was in that time of my life. John and I were living in Portland – he was applying to graduate schools (hence the reference to rhode island). i had just started blogging a few months prior and had recently discovered the world of scrapbook stores, and mixed media art. i was busy experimenting with my newfound love and expression. i was working full time at a hospital as a medical ICU/cardiac social worker. i was obsessed with johnny cash. and my heart was nearly exploding with possibilities, like an entire new world was opening up with art. about 8 months after that post, we moved to CA for john’s graduate school, i opened up an etsy shop, and committed to making a living with my art while still working part time as a medical social worker.
so much has changed since i wrote that post so many years ago, but it touched me deeply to see that photo of our little tree in the reflection of the window – just an everyday snapshot, before i paid attention to taking better photos and editing them in photoshop. and it also occurred to me how much my writing has changed, how much i shared back then about the details of my everydays, how free i was. i see myself and my life in that post through tender lens – that version of myself was so open, and ready to receive. and energetic. and happy. and uncomplicated.
fast forward four years and here i am, living my wildest dreams, working crazy hours, sometimes overwhelmed (at times wishing i had a regular full time job with weekends off), but still blissed out that i’m actually able to do what i love, and still, more than ever, believing in the expansiveness of possibility.
i almost can’t believe what i wrote in that post 4 years ago:
sometimes it feels like i’m on the very edge of my own possibilities. it’s feeling like my every thought, every heartbeat is screaming at me to take the leap of faith but i somehow hold back, just enough to keep my feet on the ground. it’s a liberating and freeing feeling, but on the other hand, it’s a bit frustrating. there’s only so much i can do in a 24 hour period. and my dreams are so much bigger than 24 hours. i’m glad i’ve got a lifetime. but i still feel in a rush.
i’m so grateful Mariette sent me that email reminding me to take a peek at who i was 4 years ago. turns out, i would have written those very same exact words today. i still feel on the edge of my own possibilities. i still feel my heart insisting that i take leaps of faith. i still navigate when/how to hold back, and when to let loose. i’m still frustrated with the constraints of time. and i’m still thankful that i have my whole life to live my dreams and possibilities into real, true blue offerings.
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ps – if you are planning on ordering any gifts from
the shop, please get your orders in asap so we can get your orders delivered in time for christmas. we’re on the countdown! all originals are sold, but lots and lots of matted/signed prints are heading out the door….
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