(self portrait last week in Atlanta, hours before getting super sick)

I’m not supposed to be here – at home, that is. I’m supposed to be in the gorgeous San Miguel on a painting retreat with several dear friends. A retreat that has been in the works and plans for months. A retreat that I used as my “light at the end of the tunnel” mantra for the past many crazy busy weeks. A retreat that I had a gut feeling would be a portal into some sort of important shift in life.

It wasn’t meant to be, I suppose. I’ve been moping around the house the last couple of days trying not to feel sorry for myself. I had a few good cries. And they helped. But still, the disappointment lingers.

I’m not sure what it is about Januaries, but they literally make me sick. My pattern is one good sinus infection in the fall and then total wipe-out in January. Funny how that happens. I should have known! Ah well. I’m working hard on letting this one go in hopes and in faith that something else will be around the corner to usher me into community and sunshine. It’s hard, though, letting this one go after so many months of planning and looking forward to it. Could be worse. This I know.

IMG_0546

Here’s what I’ve been doing to amuse myself in between sleeping marathons:
-Reading the stack of magazines that have been piling up since October. Country Living and O are my faves.
-Perusing pinterest. This sign made me chuckle out loud.
-Watching The Bachelor – I’m totally sucked in. 
-Catching up on blog reading which happens about once/month these days. Current current blog crush: Just Something I Made
-Wondering if I really need P90X to lose the twenty pounds I gained last year or if I should instead consider giving up the double stuffed oreos
-Loving on my family and letting them love on me
-Checking in on our students over at the Hello Soul Hello Business e-course. They’re lit up, inspired, and so am I. The conversations and discussions are deep and I’m loving the aha’s we’re all having together. What I love about this course is that I’m learning in very big ways right along with everyone else. I’m a tough student so this is good news for me! 
-Sending myself emails and voice recordings from bed. Do you guys do that? Reminders, thoughts, ideas – all sent to myself via the trusty iphone.
-Avoiding my still packed luggage for Mexico.
-Watching the snow fall here in Portland – really quiet and beautiful.

Hi, I'm Kelly Rae Roberts!

Before I picked up my first paintbrush at the age of 30, I was a medical social worker. I followed my whispers and started playing with paint and everything changed. Now I’m a full-time artist, author and Possibilitarian, who helps women explore their creativity, nourish their souls and build a thriving creative business.

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