i am thankful for my tenderness in these moments because it reminds me of my own fragility. sometimes i tend to be a little too aloof and judgemental (as i was in my deleted blog post yesterday) . it’s good to be humbled by change, isn’t it? and it’s also humbling to have convinced yourself that you’re doing ok only to have the slightest thing send you tumbling toward fear and tears. lately my fears have been centered around being tossed alone into big life challenges. it seems this past year or so i’ve been in control of my personal leaps: quit the full time job and do part time only. start selling art. launch a website. send in a book proposal, a magazine proposal. apply to juried art festivals, and so on. they were decisions and leaps i made with much thought and excitement and worry and anticipation. but still, they were my leaps. but lately, lately the leaps have been out of my control, feeling more like forced pushes into the unknown. of course, it’s all good for me. after a long conversation with my friend this evening, it feels like it will all come together. the uncertainty and the unknown will force me to think outside the box and it will push my creativity and my personal strength to new bounds. it’s the tension and friction i’ve been feeling lately. in the end, the wrinkles smooth into a lovely new idea or painting or conversation or resolution. i suppose it’s what life is all about.
on a side note, it seems everyday i am opening a box of amazing, breath stopping art from some very talented and lovely women who are all contributing their talents and art to the book. i am forever grateful to these women. each opened box is bringing more joy to me than they will ever know. i’m so lucky. i can hardly wait for this book to birth itself. it’s all happening…soon, it will be out in the world…man, talk about vulnerability and sensitivity!
on another side note, several of the prints on my etsy boutique will be retired this weekend, so if there is a print you’ve been thinking about, then please get it soon! new original art and new prints will be uploaded this weekend. finally!